Top Gear Margovya
Season 2
No. of Episodes 11
Original Run June 26, 2009 - September 4, 2009
Written by Yelizaveta Vulvanova
Directed by Yelizaveta Vulvanova
Top Gear Margovya chronology
Series 1
Series 3

The second series of the television series Top Gear Margovya began on June 26, 2009 and concluded on September 4, 2009. The series featured eleven episodes, including the first (and to date only) live episode of the show. The last episode featured the best and worst moments of Top Gear Margovya, and was called Best (and Worst) of Top Gear Margovya.

Overall no. No. in series Reviews Guest Airdate
7 1 Yakovich V300, Lubovenko LUBO100, Yamahova Motors V8, Andropov K-Sutra Zarya Yarinich June 26, 2009
Introduction: The girls kick off the second series of Top Gear Margovya by declaring that they are broadcasting the episode live from New York City. Gavrina says that it took a lot of red tape and under-the-table deals bureaucratic pressure before they were finally allowed to do a live episode.

Main Review: The presenters review the sports cars that they bought using their husbands' credit cards (except for Gavrina, who doesn't have a husband, so she used her brother Vasily's savings account instead). Gavrina reviews the Lubovenko LUBO100, which has a top speed of 343 kph. The Pimp drove it around the Top Gear Margovya test track in New York in 1:20.0. Tanya reviews the Yakovich V300, which has a top speed of 411 kph, but is not recommended for racing because of its delicate nature, as shown in the last episode of the first series. Maria reviews the Andropov K-Sutra, which has a top speed of 408 kph.

Challenge Part 1: Gavrina challenges Maria to drive her K-Sutra from New York City to San Francisco, California and back, which took her approximately 11 days, 23 hours, 30 minutes and 12 seconds, to which Gavrina remarked, "What a slow-driving svoloch!".

Challenge Part 2: While Maria was driving to San Francisco, Tanya and Gavrina reviewed the Yamahova Motors V8. Their challenge was to try to drive it over the Empire State Building, but after they declared that the challenge was both "impossible and implausible," the producers reveal that there had been a typo and tell them that their real challenge was to drive through the Empire State Building. On the first try, the motorcycle missed the Empire State Building completely; on their second try, they went into the building but crashed into the reception desk, and on their third try, they successfully went through the building without a scratch.

Star in a Reasonably Priced Car: Arbatskaya jurist (now Incumbent Chief Justice) Zarya Yarinich sits down with Gavrina and talks about her career as a judge and lawyer, her relationship with her new boyfriend, Justice Minister Jim Madiganov, the reason/s why she left Not so Socialist, and the film Birth of the Margovyan Vogue, where she played the role of Yekaterina Fedorova-Filitova, the wife of former President Baba Filitov. She also showed the hosts the clothes she made, and drove around the Top Gear Margovya test track in New York in 1:54.7.

Trivia: This was the first, and to date, only live episode of Top Gear Margovya.

8 2 Yakovich U2, Yakovich V400, Yakovich "V401" Bono July 3, 2009
Main Review: Gavrina reviews the Yakovich U2, the model that came after the U (which Gavrina criticized "to hurt its feelings", according to Tanya), and declared that it's "worse" than the U (and just as bad as the music of the band of the same name, which she obviously hates), since it can go from 0 to 100 (kph) in a "boring" 9.1 seconds, and the car's top speed of 381 kph doesn't even help. The U2 is horrible for use in drifting, and it's even more delicate than the V300.

Challenge Part 1: Gavrina and Maria reviewed the V300 (again), and try to paint it while it's moving at its top speed of 411 kph. However, the girls get paint all over their bodies before they can even paint one-fourth of the V300. They did manage to finish painting the car from red to the Not so Socialist colors (Light Blue for Kalinina, Yellow for Kumilyova and Orange for Atolova) in 7 hours, 18 minutes and 46 seconds.

Challenge Part 2: Tanya reviews the Yakovich V400, and tries to turn it into a convertible. She succeeded and called the finished product the Yakovich "V401", to which Maria said, "If we are going to fix a Yakovich sports car in the V series, are we always going to replace the '00' with '01'?". However, Gavrina played some clips showing Tanya testing her "V401" and pressing the top-down button, but the top went down literally, falling down and hitting Tanya's head.

Star in a Reasonably Priced Car: U2 vocalist Bono is, surprisingly, the Star in a Reasonably Priced Car, which made Gavrina nervous, especially after she had "insulted" the Yakovich U2, and U2 (the band) itself. ("I insulted the CAR, not the BAND!", Gavrina said). Tanya interviews Bono, who states that he doesn't take Gavrina's statements about the band personally, and even performing the classic U2 hit "With Or Without You". Bono also talked about his career, and his opinion on the bands of Margovya, including Not so Socialist. Bono drove around the Top Gear Margovya test track in 1:44.3.

Trivia: Gavrina was "forced" to interview Bono after Tanya and Maria walked out of the studio, but for the purposes of balancing, the interview was shot again, this time with Tanya interviewing Bono, which was the version that Let's Talk Margovya aired. Let's Talk Margovya revealed that it was part of the presenters' contracts that they would give equal opportunity to each other in interviewing the Star in a Reasonably Priced Car, and that such things were "very unfair to both the presenters and their loyal viewers". Top Gear Margovya did post Gavrina's interview with Bono on their website, and included it on the "bonus materials" section of the official Series 2 DVD.

9 3 Yakovich U-SHUT UP, Lubovenko LUBO120 Lev Elemat July 10, 2009
Main Review: Tanya reviews the Yakovich U-SHUT UP, which has a top speed of 415 kilometers per hour. The Pimp drives it around the Top Gear Margovya test track in 1:14.1.

Challenge Part 1: Tanya reviews the Lubovenko LUBO120, which has a top speed of 379 kph, and tries to drive it down a 20-kilometer freeway course with, supposedly, a stink bomb that Maria placed in the car. However, Maria secretly replaced the stink bomb with a real explosive device inside the car and blew it up.

Challenge Part 2: Gavrina tries to drive the LUBO120 down the freeway course while listening to "Road Trip Gone Wrong" by TPB as loudly as possible. Gavrina survives the bridge part, wherein vocalist Roland Tidzhomov shouts "Baby on the road!!". However, Tanya yells "Baby on the road!" to mess up with Gavrina, causing the latter to crash.

10 4 Andropov K-linin, Andropov K-milyov, "Car-froggy" Vyacheslav Klimov July 17, 2009
Main Review:Tanya reviews the Andropov K-linin, which has a top speed of 338 kph. The Pimp drives it around the Top Gear Margovya test track in 1:26.2.

Review: Gavrina reviews the Andropov K-milyov. She shouts, "Too bad Fyodor Andropov didn't remember you, Maria!" and drives it down a freeway filled with baby barf (and a secret barf contribution from Tanya).

Challenge: Maria, feeling "bitter" about the K-linin and K-milyov, decided to make her own car, and called it the "Car-froggy", because of its amphibious nature. To test its ability, she drives it down the Amazona Pass in Fyodorov, Quintin del Pan and down the Amazon River up to the river's mouth on the northern coast of Brazil.

11 5 Yakovich U-KISS, Porsche Cayman Gavril Andropov July 24, 2009
Main Review: Gavrina reviews the 2005 model Porsche Cayman, which has a top speed of 275 kph. The Pimp drives it around the Top Gear Margovya test track in 1:38.8.

Review: Maria reviews the Yakovich U-KISS, which has a top speed of 298 kph, and tries to race it against faster Yakovich sports cars in an off-road rally race.

Challenge: Tanya, Gavrina and Maria each try to push an armored vehicle for one kilometer, and try to beat the Pimp's record of 31 minutes and 37 seconds. Tanya manages to do it in 1:21:37, Gavrina makes it in 1:00:09, and Maria does it in 2:12:33. On the fourth try, the three pushed the vehicle together, and manages to do it in 38 minutes and 4 seconds, which is sadly still not enough to beat the Pimp's record.

12 6 Yakovich R10, Yakovich T92 Hafimwahlid Talnaev July 31, 2009
Main Review: Maria reviews the Yakovich R10, which has a top speed of 331 kph, and the Pimp drives it around the Top Gear Margovya test track in 1:32.2.

Review: Gavrina reviews the Yakovich T92, which has a top speed of 302 kph, and tests it on a 1-kilometer oval track, where it recorded a time of 31.2 seconds.

Challenge: Tanya tries to drive the T92 on a 20-kilometer freeway while eating "exotic" Cayenne peppers, which the trio bought from a very old stinky market in Svolochyville, Opula a fancy market in Cayenne, French Guyana. After eating twenty Cayenne peppers without drinking any water, Tanya drives the T92 on the freeway course before she crashed after driving about 678 meters.

13 7 Yakovich Q4, Andropov K-onev, Yakovich S6969 Rurik Pankavuranov August 7, 2009
Main Review: Maria, still feeling "bitter" about the Andropov K-linin and K-milyov SUVs, reviews the Andropov K-onev, which "makes her sick", after which she said "No offense, Yuliya [Koneva]". It has a top speed of 202 kph (to which Maria remarked "You dare call yourself a sports car?!"), and can go from 0 to 100 (kph) in a "long" 9.9 seconds. The Pimp drives it around the Top Gear Margovya test track in 1:57.5, the slowest car ever tested on Top Gear Margovya to date.

Review: Tanya reviews the Yakovich S6969, which has a top speed of 369 kph (of course), and tries to drive it on a freeway course filled with obstacles.

Challenge: Gavrina tries to stand on top of the Yakovich Q4, which has a top speed of 397 kph, for at least one minute while the Pimp drives it down a 20-kilometer freeway. However, Gavrina falls down after 36.5 seconds, thereby losing the challenge.

14 8 Yakovich S777, Suzukova Dmitrievsky D7 Viktor Boevsky August 14, 2009
Main Review: Tanya reviews the Yakovich S777, which, according to her, "makes her feel like she's in heaven". It can go from 0 to 100 in 3.1 seconds, and has a top speed of 377 kph. With a weight of only 881.75 kg, Tanya declared that the car really is "heavenly". The Pimp drives the S777 around the Top Gear Margovya test track in 1:15.4.

Challenge: After receiving emails from motorcycle manufacturing companies asking them why they never did any challenges involving motorcycles, Gavrina and Maria purchased a Suzukova Dmitrievsky D7 from the black market for only 11,500 margots. Gavrina tries to drive the D7 down a ramp and through the "ring of fire" (which was actually a hula hoop 500 feet in the air wrapped with thirty pairs of Tanya's underwear (unknown to Tanya) and set on fire). Gavrina manages to finish the challenge; however, one of Tanya's burning panties falls on Gavrina's face.

15 9 Yakovich P70 Konrad Andropov August 21, 2009
Main Review: Tanya reviews the Yakovich P70, which can go from 0 to 100 in about 4.1 seconds, and has a top speed of 377 kilometers per hour. Tanya also says that for a decade, this was the most expensive SUV in Margovya (it cost about 2.6 million margots), before the Yakovich V600 (with a price tag of about 3.3 million margots) came along and surpassed it. The Pimp drives it around the Top Gear Margovya test track in 1:22.0.

Challenge: The girls test their sales talk skills by selling fifty Yakovich P70 SUVs each. They must sell it for twice its original street value, so they must sell it for at least 5.2 million margots each. The presenter who sells the most P70s after 24 hours shall keep the money she accumulated and wins five Yakovich P70 sports cars and a Yakovich P-iss Off, while the presenter who sells the least shall push a P70 (it weighs about 8,500 kilograms) along a 20-kilometer freeway. Tanya manages to sell thirty-seven of her P70s, Gavrina distributed forty-five, while Maria sold only twenty-three, meaning that Gavrina wins the challenge, and the prize totaling 234 million margots, plus five P70s and a Yakovich P-iss Off, while Maria has to push a P70 along a twenty-kilometer freeway.

16 10 Yakovich P90 Gennady Elemat August 28, 2009
Main Review: Gavrina reviews the Yakovich P90, which can go from 0 to 100 in about 4.1 seconds, and has a top speed of 362 kilometers per hour. The Pimp drives it around the Top Gear Margovya test track in 1:24.4.

Challenge: After having an argument over which is better between taking a bus and driving a car along the Northern Margovyan Superhighway in terms of costs, comfort and travel time, Tanya and Maria declared a duel, with Tanya boarding a Margovyan Rabbit bus and Maria driving the Yakovich P90, and after both reached the expressway's eastern end point in Yobatav, Arbatskaya, the results were:

  • Costs: In taking the bus, the formula for fare cost is 15 margots for the first six kilometers, plus 2 margots for every succeeding kilometer, thus in Tanya's case (749 kilometers), it added up to 1,501 margots. However, as the P90 consumes a lot of gasoline (1 liter for every 6 kilometers), Maria bought a total of 125 liters, and it cost her 6,085 margots (not to mention the over 2,000-margot toll fee along the expressway), meaning that Tanya and the bus won first round.
  • Comfort: Without a doubt, the P90 is the most comfortable SUV made by Anton Yakovich, and Maria said this out loud all throughout the drive to Yobatav. Meanwhile, inside the bus, Tanya was very much not at ease, what with the boring film playing on the bus (The Interceptor II by Rurik Pankavuranov), and the person sitting next to her falling asleep and snoring for about one and a half hours. Maria and the car definitely win the second round.
  • Travel Time: Maria, dubbed "Captain Slow" by Tanya and Gavrina because of her slow and careful driving, took a total of 4 hours, 49 minutes and 5 seconds in the P90, while Tanya in the Margovyan Rabbit Bus took only about 3 hours, 31 minutes and 50 seconds, thereby winning the third round.

Star in a Reasonably Priced Car: Although having a busy schedule ahead of him, Incumbent President (at the time) Gennady Elemat finds time to show up in Top Gear Margovya as the Star in a Reasonably Priced Car, with Maria fainting upon hearing the announcement (and with Gavrina remarking "the man's married, and so are you"). During the interview (with Maria, of course), the thirty-three-year-old President talked about his political career, the death threats that he had accumulated so far, his spouse Fanniya (much to the ire of Maria), and about the magazine show Cars of Margovya, being the first among CoM's past hosts to be interviewed in TGM. Elemat drove around the Top Gear Margovya test track in 1:40.0, which was then the fastest lap time around the track (later to be beaten by now Incumbent President Viktoriya Vegova).

Trivia: While inspecting the P90 loaned by the Yakovich Motor Corporation to the show, Maria discovers an FN P90 personal defense weapon in the trunk of the car. Although not seen on the show, she kept the P90 because she "didn't know what else to do with it".

17 11 None Svetlana Lanuva September 4, 2009
Introduction: The girls announce that due to "severe" budget problems, they are not going to review any cars for this episode, but instead, they will be showing some bloopers and outtakes from previous episodes, and some scenes from previous episodes that were cut or deleted from the original run, like Gavrina's interview with Bono in the second episode of the second series.

Star in a Reasonably Priced Car: Though Top Gear Margovya is pressed for funds, they still have a SIARPC segment, in which they feature rumor talk show host Svetlana Lanuva as a guest. During the interview with Maria, Lanuva talked about her show, The Svetlana Lanuva Talk Show, which is so far the longest-running talk show in Margovya. She also talked about her career, and drove around the Top Gear Margovya test track, where she posted a lap time of 2:26.6, then the slowest run in the Crown Victoria (later to be beaten by Teddyevsky).

2009 Top Gear Margovya Awards:

  • Ugliest Car: Yakovich S6969
  • Worst Car: Andropov K-onev. The Yakovich U2 came at a close second.
  • Worst Dressed presenter in Top Gear Marogvya: Tanya in her ash-covered outfit after doing the "stink bomb" challenge (Series 2, Episode 3)
  • Best Noise: Tanya yelling "Baby on the Road!" on a megaphone while Gavrina was doing the "Road Trip Gone Wrong" challenge (Series 2, Episode 3)
  • Best Driver: Gennady Elemat, Baba Filitov came at a close second.
  • Car of the Year (2009): Yakovich U-Shut Up
  • Car of the Decade (2000-2009): Yakovich U-Shut Up

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